As a dating coach for smart, strong, successful women, I spend an inordinate amount of time explaining this very simple concept.
Over time, invariably, the dizzy sensation starts to fade. The mask slips off, the imperfections show and become magnified. Suddenly, you’re not the couple making love five times a week and jetting off to Istanbul.
You’re the couple with two crying kids that is so exhausted at the end of the day that sex is about the furthest thing from your mind.
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So they break up, searching for the next high, only to find that the NEXT relationship has a completely different set of issues.
The only way around this, I’d suppose, would be a George Clooney lifestyle.
A series of passionate affairs, all of which are doomed to end after six months to two years.
But if you aren’t content with a revolving door of partners, and like the idea of partnership and growing old with someone, what are you to do?
Sonja Lyobomirsky, a scientist I’ve cited here before, describes a slew of research-tested actions and words that can do wonders to keep love alive. Lyubomirsky emphasizes “the importance of appreciation”: count your blessings and resist taking a spouse for granted.